feeling sick-ish the past few days. damn annoying ==
been sleeping such long hours, but still liddat. zzz.
today feeling worse but probably coz i woke up in the middle of the night ytr and couldnt go back to sleep.
nagging at me annoys me even more lol

anw ytr was my really close friend's bday
wish i could have celebrated it with him with the rest of my clique
but i wasnt invited and stuff
i was replaced a long time ago it seems
it doesnt matter what you say that i omitted myself or anything
you didnt make the effort for me to have been able to go.
it hurt a lot that i couldnt be there for him.
but then im the only nostalgic fool here
who lost all his friends and watch them celebrate happily together
proclaiming everything on facebook as if to taunt me
but what can i do?
you ganged up against me and still insist it's my fault
who would defend me if i didnt?
all fucking bullshit.
you wouldnt even talk to me face to face and get some lame messenger to convey your concerns or sth?
she doesnt even care fyi.
whatever anw. i gave up hope on this "group of friends"
i'll just pass him his present and wish him alone
sad hor? hahaha. my life.

gonna fail my a levels. feeling like giving up econs to the guillotines. lol.
sick + low morale + no mood + low productivity.
+ NO MONEY. HAHA. cannot go snsd concert cannot go out study at cafes like an atas kid.
well i wasnt one to start with.


where do i get my strength to smile sometimes, i wonder
maybe it's from the void within that mocks the world.